


Big Rockstars

by FreakCityPrincess



Series: Crackfic Collection [2]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Awkward Encounters of the Galactic Kind, Bodhi Rook Appreciation Fic, Crack Treated Seriously, Drunk Kissing, Everyone loves Bodhi Rook, F/M, Gen, Jyn & Bodhi as adorable space siblings, Rebellion Party Games, Truth or Dare
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-16
Updated: 2018-04-16
Packaged: 2019-04-19 04:24:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14229204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FreakCityPrincess/pseuds/FreakCityPrincess
Summary: With the excuse of wanting to impress a Corporal he likes, Bodhi finally manages to drag Jyn into one of the dumb games of his growing social circle.Needless to say, Jyn is disgusted.





	Big Rockstars

**Author's Note:**

> This is set sometime after the events of _Giving Consent to Fate_ and before the battle of Hoth, but it also holds up as a standalone (and it's not a serious fic, lol).
> 
> Gotta mention I wrote most of this while listening to Nickelback, which is where the title comes from. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Five months after the Alliance settled on Hoth, and absolutely nobody had warmed up to the new Base. Hah. Warmed up. Her sense of humour seemed to be evolving to suit the misery of her sorroundings, though. 

Jyn had run back-to-back missions for the past five months, only stopping in at Hoth for brief, essential intervals, and she was already to itching to get off the frozen wasteland. Every rebel developed some strategy to keep themselves from going stir-crazy when stationed here- taking the Tauntauns out for a ride, firing shots at the range, getting into a legitimate sparring session or starting definitely-unallowed fights- but Jyn found out, to her greatest irritation, that none of these activities kept her sated for very long.

Sure, Chirrut and Baze always welcomed a volunteer in their close combat classes, and she was already developing a reputation for being deadly in a fight. Cassian often invited her to the range or the droid bay for sharing their knowledge on programming and slicing. She liked spending her time that way. But some days, Cassian had other work, or the hall got too cold and slippery for Chirrut's lessons, and she didn't have a lot of other friends. 

Except one. One Jyn had easily come to trust and like, who was great at conversations and never failed to brighten a dull mood, but one she was hell bent on avoiding for as long as they were stationed on Hoth. 

Because while Jyn didn't have many friends, Bodhi Rook simply entertained _too many._

She was holed up in her cabin, now, alone because the four others she shared it with were running missions or otherwise- Jyn felt bitterly envious of those doing useful things for the rebellion- cleaning the barrel of the blaster she'd stolen from Cassian, what felt like a lifetime ago, on a flight to Jedha. She hummed to herself as she worked because she felt she'd go crazy if she didn't have more than one thing to focus on. 

There was a rap on her cabin door and Jyn perked up. It was almost embarrassing, really, how the slightest promise of _activity_ excited her, but that had to be Cassian, and because he was coming from a meeting with Draven it could also be an assignment. Force, how she _missed_ assignments.

Jyn's responsive grin froze on her face when she opened the door to a cheerful Bodhi with...something...stuffed under an arm. 

"I need a date for Jockey night," he announced without preamble. 

"What the..." Jyn raised an unappreciative eyebrow. " _Jockey night?_ "

"Party night," Bodhi shrugged. "Corellian Drinking Day. The traditional festival of throwing back shots and taking home a different person than the one you came with."

Jyn's distaste must have been obvious. "You just described every other adult party with alcohol. Also, remind me again that you don't even drink?"

"Hardly matters," Bodhi huffed, stuffing his free hand into his jacket. She realized only now what he was carrying; a large stuffed animal toy with messy stitches where you couldn't see them and meticulous stitches in the more apparent places. "So, are you coming?"

"The kark is that?" asked Jyn, pointing. 

To her surprise, instead of a stubborn reprisal of his own question, Bodhi blinked down at the stuffed toy and blushed furiously. 

"Nothing," he hid it, uselessly, behind his back. "You coming or not?"

Jyn crossed her arms, interest piqued now. Not in the average-adult-party-with-alcohol, but in this promise of a puzzle waiting to be figured out. 

"Is it a gift for someone?"

Bodhi scowled outright, although the effect of it was somewhat dampened by the bright red stain on his cheeks. "Stop changing the topic, Jyn. I'm inviting you for Jockey night. Yes or no?"

"No," said Jyn simply, then amended her answer before he could prod for reasons. "But I _will_ consider it if you spill the secret of the...stuffed Bantha toy."

"Tauntaun," grumbled Bodhi, not quite meeting her eyes. "It's a Tauntaun."

"For?" Jyn needled gently. 

"For-" Bodhi choked. "It's not for anyone!"

"Uh huh," Jyn started closing the door. "Goodnight."

She grinned when the pilot hurriedly stuck a foot between the closing door and the wall. "Wait," he said, a little desperately. "I'll tell you. If...If you agree to come. Please?"

Jyn pursed her lips as if in thought, trying her damnest not to laugh at the desperate, pleading look on her good friend's face.

"Please," he repeated, showcasing eyes that she would be heartless to turn down. 

"Alright," she swung open the door. "Where do they host parties on Hoth, anyway?"

###### 

Jyn cursed whatever kriff-hat who discovered a warm corner of Echo Base and thought to convert it into a _party venue._

The room behind the generators that powered the entirety of Base and ran lines to the charging ports of the droid bay was warm, packed and steaming. Someone had got music going, and cheap remodeled shuttle-lights pulsed gentle colours that painted the sea of the heads. Drunken heads. Singing heads. Everyone was going wild on the smuggled alcohol.

Bodhi, dressed civilly in a relatively unscathed jacket and a black shirt, with his hair combed back and tied neater than she'd ever seen it (and most certainly two hundred percent sober) didn't fit in with the crowd _at all,_ while Jyn could blend in with her five days-unwashed vest and weathered field boots. 

But Bodhi wasn't the one who stood out like a sore thumb when it came to real interaction. He spoke to a lot of people, and a lot of people invited him over, and he never seemed to get tired of all the conversation and toasts made in his name.

"You don't even _need_ me to be here," muttered Jyn as soon as he jogged to catch up with her after yet another handshake with some rebel.

"What?" he asked, having not heard her the first time. 

Jyn turned her volume up a notch. "I said, it doesn't look like you need me here! You have enough of people to hang out with."

"What? Oh!" The pilot shook his head. "I, uh...look, there's a different reason..."

Jyn followed when he urgently tugged her in another direction. 

"Alright," she leaned against the wall in their secluded corner. Cast a few glances about. It was a surprise this space hadn't been taken up by a couple making out yet. "Spill. And tell me where the stuffed Tauntaun fits in with all of this."

Bodhi took in a deep breath, visibly calming his nerves, before launching into an incorrigible ramble that she couldn't make head or tail of.

"I didn't understand a word you just said."

"It's Jedhan," breathed Bodhi, steadying himself on the wall beside her. "Oh. I didn't...I didn't realize."

Jyn gave him a pointed look. _I don't have all night._ He laughed nervously, running a hand through his hair, messing up the perfect front for the first time tonight. 

"You know the, um, the Corporal that Chirrut started training?"

Jyn raised an eyebrow, all the way to her hairline. "You're going to have to be a bit more specific."

"Kriff. The, uh, the pretty one." Bodhi coloured terribly, keeping his gaze trained objectively on the floor. "Sonia."

Jyn couldn't help the little quirk that lifted a corner of her lips. "What about the Corporal?"

The pilot awkwardly scratched the back of his neck. "So I've...I've been in touch, and we were talking last week, and she mentioned stuffed toys were a...a token of affection on her planet, and said she'd love it if someone gave her one, after all this time, so I asked Chirrut to teach me how to make one and the only thing I could think of was a Tauntaun." He bit his lip so hard that for a moment Jyn flinched. "I didn't consider how to...you know, actually give the gift."

Jyn's features cracked into a decidedly interested grin. "Why tonight?"

"It's..." Bodhi shifted uncomfortably. "It's her birthday. I didn't...didn't see her the whole day, but she normally turns up for Corellian Drinking Nights."

"I don't see the gift with you."

Bodhi looked mollified. "Well of course not, I can't bring it in _here!_ "

"So what's the plan? Go for a walk and stop at your quarters to fetch it?"

"I haven't thought that far."

Jyn sighed. Of course he hadn't. "That's why I'm here, then?"

"You're so confident in dealing with, with feelings," said Bodhi absently, scanning the room with his eyes. Tonight's host, a very drunk Gamorrean, was starting to herald people into some mass-participation party game. "I mean, you obviously like Cassian, but you play it cool all the time and _he_ hasn't figured it out yet. I don't want to come off as desperate or anything, you know?"

Jyn had gone stock still.

"I really like her. She's so kind, and sweet, and...she reminds me of home for some reason. I don't want to blow my chances by looking like some over-interested creep."

"What was that?" Jyn asked, finally blinking back to reality. 

Bodhi glanced at her. "Um, I was saying I didn't want to come off as desperate-"

"No, the other thing. About Cassian."

Bodhi paused, seeming to catch onto his mistake. "Kriff. Sorry."

"What was it?"

He offered her a weak grin. "I was just pulling your leg, Jyn, obviously. Just...just kidding. It's fun to annoy you." He abruptly changed the topic. "Hey look, they're playing the draw game!"

"What the...hey!"

Bodhi's pull was stronger than her guess, which resulted in him successfully dragging her into the thick of the crowd, around a platform where Drunk Host was pulling names out of a styrofoam box. 

"Watch," said Bodhi excitedly, not letting go of her hand lest she lash out or run away. 

"Saigon Bane!" he read out at the top of his voice. "Will Saigon please step up for the very first round?"

A rebel stumbled onto the raised platform with a shot glass in hand, to the approving cheers and hoots of the audience. He waltzed around a bit, definitely not sober enough to be making good life choices, and gulped down the alcohol in hand. The crowd applauded.

"Pick a face from the crowd!" encouraged Drunk Host. Then he looked at the crowd and whisper-screamed, "Duck if you don't want to get picked!"

Jyn only had the time for a confused "Wha-?" before Bodhi pulled her down into a crouch.

"What the karking hell is going on?" she hissed. 

"It's a game," replied Bodhi, a buzz of exhilaration in his voice. He was _enjoying_ this. 

There were wolf-whistles from the sea of heads around them, and Bodhi took it as his cue to haul both himself and her up to their feet to watch the action. Saigon had picked a member of groundstaff about his age, and they stumbled into each other and shared a sloppy kiss. They grinned like idiots at their audience afterward, bowing to tremendous applause and whistles. 

"This is ridiculous," muttered Jyn, unable to tear her eyes away from the frenzy of alcoholic- Force, how many Alliance rules were these people breaking right now? How would they run _any_ duties the following morning with painful hangovers? 

"That's what makes it fun!" exclaimed Bodhi delightedly, and holy shavit of a Sea-Bantha, he wasn't even drunk.

"Bailin Thorus!" called the host. "Private Bailin?"

"I'm not sticking around for any more of this," Jyn purposefully turned her head away. "Find your sweetheart and take her somewhere classy. I'm off."

Bodhi's eyes widened. "Jyn, no."

Damn crowd, hollering now, was making it impossible to squeeze through. Bodhi latching onto her arm didn't help. "Please wait."

She swallowed a frustrated growl, whipping around to face him. "What?"

"I haven't found her yet."

"We've been here the whole night, Bodhi," Jyn closed her eyes, compressing her growing irritation. "If she's here, you would've run into her already. Let's go before it gets worse."

Then, as if the whole known universe and the Force that flowed through it had a petty personal agenda against her, it got worse.

"Jyn Erso!" called a wasted, loud voice. "Jyn Erso?"

Even as her entire frame went rigid and a dozen warning alarms blared in her skull, Jyn's survival instinct kicked in and she started to push her way out of the crowd faster, and Bodhi started helping this time. 

To their incredible bad luck, the next body Jyn slammed into happened to belong to Kes Dameron. 

"Jyn?" he said, vocally. "I didn't think you were the type...?"

"Ah, there she is!" exclaimed Drunk Host Jyn Really Wanted to Claw the Eyes Out of Now. The crowd parted with a collective _ooh_ like a crack in the ice of Hoth, leaving her in plain sight with nowhere left to run. 

Jyn couldn't catch up fast enough to understand what happened next. Somehow she found herself on the raised platform, in even plainer sight of the gathered crowd, with the host slurring the instructions to her. The amount of happy drunk faces that grinned hopefully at her was the single most disturbing thing Jyn had seen in a long while.

"Can't make a choice?" the host asked with sickening, genuine-sounding sympathy.

Jyn nodded slowly, because the alternative was to injure him, and then she'd be breaking another one of Command's meticulous guidelines for discipline.

"Alright then, as per the rules, we'll make it _for_ you!"

Jyn startled. "What?"

"Who would like to kiss Jyn?"

"Hold on," she sputtered. "Hold on, what?"

There was a sea of raised hands amidst a chorus of good-humoured, drunken laughter, and in the middle of it all she managed to catch sight of Bodhi, turning pale and sinking into the crowd.

The next two seconds were a blur. The host picked a volunteer. Something twice her size slammed into her, hard. Something wet and disgusting caught her breath. 

Jyn choked and doubled over, coughing through her lips and darting out her tongue, suffocating on the aftertaste of cheap liquor and bad breath. Something big fell back into the sea of faces. More cheers. She didn't even feel them usher her off the stage. 

_Kriff. Kriff, kriff, kriff-_

She needed a corner to throw up. She would throw up here, now, if the fumes didn't make it a terrible place to open your mouth in. 

Someone grabbed her arm and yanked her out of the thick of the crowd. She suddenly found more breathing space, enough to bend on her knees and start gasping for air, but a familiar, frightened face swam in her peripheral vision and that grabbed her attention first. 

" _Bodhi,_ " she breathed. 

The pilot had lost at least five shades of colour. "I'm s-sorry," he squeaked. 

Something in Jyn snapped. 

"I'm sorry!" Bodhi called, anguished, as she briskly headed away. He kept right on apologising as she looked around, found an exit, and breezed out of the insufferable boiler-room party onto one of the cold, slippery corridors of Echo Base.

"Jyn!" He had to break into a jog to keep up, and three times in five meters he nearly slipped. "Jyn, I'm so sorry! I didn't- I didn't know it was going to happen, I didn't give them your name, I-I'm _so sorry!_ "

Jyn continued her brisk walk with the murderous aura without losing her foothold even once, and without a backward glance. 

"Come on! Please, it's not my- please don't hate me!"

She stopped abruptly before the common 'fresher, aggressively pulled open the door and slammed it behind her before he caught up. 

Bodhi turned the handle and pulled but it didn't budge. Feeling miserable, he realised she'd jammed it.

"Jyn?" He knocked. "Jyn, please."

There was no response. 

"Come on," he pleaded. "I'm sorry. I'll-I'll get you something? I'll buy you a drink? Or-Or a blanket, uh, sweets or something?"

If she didn't respond to the offer of blankets or sweets, it meant she was _really_ mad. 

Helpless, he sunk to the frictionless floor and knocked again, but weakly. "I'm sorry I made you come for a party you wouldn't like."

He looked up at the heavy durasteel door, as if it would give any indication that she was listening. 

And his eyes widened. 

"Jyn?" he shouted, scrambling to his feet and banging on the door. " _Jyn!_ "

  


Jyn was too busy furiously rinsing the spit and alcohol from her mouth to even acknowledge whatever Bodhi was trying to say from the other side. The heavy door muffled his sound anyway. He would probably apologise for days and there was a limited number of ways in which a person could apologise for one thing, so chances were she wasn't missing anything right now. 

She _did_ feel sick to the pit of her stomach. She liked her personal space and she didn't let strangers up and kiss her. Especially not strangers who could kill her by falling on her or render her unconscious with their bad breath.

Force, that was _disgusting._

She had to utilise the mirror in front of the sink to monitor how well she scratched her tongue with her fingernails while the faucet sputtered cold, ice-derived water. Scrubbed her lips with a dabbed corner of her scarf. Rise, spit, scrub, repeat. 

Would it be okay to throw up in the sink? She could still taste it. She'd rather taste her own vomit. 

Gross. The guy- Jyn was pretty sure it had been a guy, although not entirely certain what species- had had bristles that had pricked into her chin and a _very_ slimy mouth. Probably not human. Maybe mucous. And a whole lot of intoxicant.

Sure, she'd undergone worse, but her physical training had prepared her for the likes of Imperial prisoner-abuse, extreme weather conditions-hell, even boring stakeout missions. It would have been a slightly different situation if she had been able to gut the invader of personal space, which she almost certainly would have done had she seen it coming.

It took a while for her to register Bodhi banging on the door a little too hard for part of an apology. 

She frowned, darting a glance at it. What was the problem? Was she in some kind of danger? Maybe these 'freshers were out of limits, or a Wampa had taken over one of the stalls or something. 

Footsteps. 

Jyn turned around, adapting a fight-or-flight stance. In her hurry she hadn't noticed the invisible turn in the wall that lead somewhere she couldn't see.

She experienced a different kind of shock when it wasn't a Wampa that came around, fore-fangs dripping rebel blood and on the hunt for food, but a known figure in a brown jacket and Alliance-issue boots. 

Cassian Andor went absolutely still the moment their eyes met. 

And then it dawned on her. Oh. _Oh._

"I'm in the wrong 'fresher...aren't I?"

Cassian seemed to slowly familiarise himself with the situation. "Yes," he said at last, a slight undertone of agreement in his voice. "Yes you are."

"Oh," she coughed into a fist, but not because of the alcoholic kiss this time. It had more to do with covering the flush spreading across her cheeks. "Kind of got that. I don't think I was watching where I was going."

He nodded carefully, taking this explanation in. Then, with a barely-noticeable glance at the open faucet, "What are you doing?"

Jyn resisted the urge to drag her hand across her face, groaning. "Nothing. Nothing. I just wanted to...wash my hands."

"Right," said Cassian, totally unconvinced, eyeing her face, which was wet. 

Bodhi chose that moment to break through the jam in the door and barge into the 'fresher, urgency in his eyes. 

"Jyn, I was trying to tell you, this is the wrong-"

He noticed Cassian raising a subtle eyebrow at him and stopped short. 

"Um. Did I...did I interrupt something?"

"Bodhi-" started Jyn, but Cassian cut her off. 

"Would one of you kindly explain what the kriff is going on?"

They shared a look between them. 

Jyn nudged him pointedly in the side. 

Bodhi took a deep breath. 

"Agrossdrunkguykissedjynanditskindofmyfault."

Cassian didn't look any more enlightened when he opened his eyes. "What?"

Bodhi dropped his shoulders, dejected. "We went for this party, and as part of a game, this drunk guy, um, he kissed Jyn."

A strange look crossed Cassian's face then, a blink-and-you'll-miss-it moment, but it took longer than his usual microsecond to replace. Still, he was every bit his brisk, inquiring self when he asked, "And how did this lead to the current situation?"

Jyn rolled her eyes. "Shouldn't it be obvious? I didn't _ask_ to be kissed, and it was disgusting. So here I am. Getting rid of the taste."

Cassian shifted his eyes to her then, wearing the same expression, but it looked a little...intense. 

"That classifies as assault you should report."

Jyn sighed. "It was a game, and they were too drunk to know what they were doing. Anyway, I don't know who it was. It won't happen again."

He kept his gaze trained on her for what felt like an eternity before, after the most indiscernible nod, the intensity fizzled from his eyes. Bodhi shifted uncomfortably onto a foot. 

"If you say so," replied Cassian. "But what you _can_ report is the alcohol at this...party, was it?"

Bodhi looked aghast. "Come on, you can't do that!"

"This is exactly the kind of reason unpermitted alcohol isn't allowed on Base," explained Cassian, unaffected. "And in the interest of preventing future incidents, it's your duty to report it."

The pilot stuck out his lower lip. "Cass, please. I can't report them. They...they trust me. And, you know, the parties are a good thing. Morales and everything."

"Hangovers," supplied Jyn. 

Bodhi groaned. "Not you, too."

She huffed, crossing her arms tightly at her chest, then around herself, exhaling icy air. "Okay. Morales. Let it go, Cassian."

Cassian met her eyes again, a partly-serious look on his face, but more a silent question. 

_Are you okay?_

She closed her eyes for a moment. _I'm fine._

Then a quick glance to her right. _It's not his fault. Don't let him pay the price._

A slight crease in his brow, a quick dart. _It'll affect him?_

She pulled in her jaw. _Yes._

"Alright," he said, finally speaking for everyone in the room. "I won't tell any seniority about this, even though most of them are probably also participants. Only, if someone approaches you in...that way again, without your consent-"

Jyn smiled wryly. "Okay, Cassian."

Bodhi sighed in obvious relief. "Thanks, Cass. And I'm sorry, Jyn. I swear I didn't know they entered names without...without you signing up for it. Or if someone else signed you up. I'll, uh, I'll ask around, if you want?"

Jyn pursed her lips in thought. Satisfying as it would be to land a good punch, she'd gotten into a lot of trouble on Base as it was. There were a limited amount of times Cassian could sweet-talk the drill sergeant who witnessed two of her brawls with Han Solo or explain to authority why the droid bay was generating extra heat in the direction of the North-Eastern barracks. Besides, Bodhi owed her a favour now, and finding a name just wasn't worth it. 

"Don't bother," she stuffed her hands in her pockets, treated him to a lopsided, mischievous smile. "It's still 0900 hours. Enough time to find the address and deliver the birthday present, right?"

Bodhi flushed terribly, but tucked his chin in and nodded. "Yeah. I guess, yeah. Uh...you're not mad at me, are you?"

"Does it look like it?" asked Jyn. _Is it even remotely possible to stay mad at him?_

"No," the pilot smiled, for real now, looking up. "Thank you. And I...I really appreciate you still doing this, Jyn, even after I-"

She slung an arm around his shoulders. "Hey. I'm not mad at you. Let's go."

"Yeah. We...we still need a plan. Gotta hurry up though. Bye, Cassian."

"Bye," replied the Captain, eyebrow touching his hairline now. But it wasn't an act. He knew what was going on. 

Jyn looked over her shoulder to flash him a grin when they reached the door.

_He's brave._

Cassian snorted quietly, but a smile formed on his lips. 

_I don't doubt it._

She narrowed her eyes playfully. _And you?_

There might've been a brief flash of...something, again, but it was gone before she caught it. 

Cassian mouthed something that she didn't get, either. In his native tongue. Casual, easy, like a generic _I'll pass_ or _it looks okay_. But she couldn't make out any of it, and she didn't understand Festian. 

"Jyn? We've been standing here for a while now."

Cassian turned his head to cover a laugh at the same time Jyn looked away and cursed him quietly in Hutteese. 

"Yeah, I was looking in the mirror," she said crisply. "Come on. Pretty Corporal is waiting on her stuffed Tauntaun."

"And her dashing Prince of Skyriver," added Cassian unobtrusively. 

Jyn smirked. "And that."

Bodhi buried his face in his jacket, the cold air of Hoth stinging the heated skin it touched. 

"Force alive," he mumbled, voice muffled in the thick layers. "Just go back to flirting with each other."

**Author's Note:**

> [Artwork of Bodhi and his stuffed Tauntaun! ](https://hoofgirl.tumblr.com/post/172965027997/you-can-be-all-kinds-of-cute-but-never-bodhi)  
>  This is an actual reaction one of my friends had to being kissed. It was mutual, but she's a hygiene freak, and I almost fell out of my chair laughing when she told me the story.


End file.
